Dress well - Your physical appearance is more important than you think. Stop wearing old T-shirts and grubby hoodies and sweatpants. Get some nice shirts and pants and get a good hair cut, it will make a massive difference.
Mistake #1 - Waiting
When I first cut things off I wasted a lot of time feeling sorry for myself instead of becoming better and moving on. So, now that your time won’t be taken up thinking and fantasizing about this girl who doesn’t love you, it is time to become better. You need to become someone that girls won’t immediately put into the friend zone category, heres how you do that.
Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support.
I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized.
he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that.
he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened.
he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence.
i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me
i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction.
after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly.
things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it.
we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe …
our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far?
this has upset me so much its hard to even function.
She told you that she “just sees you as a friend.” So now what do you do? Simple, you cut her off. First grow some balls and tell her that “you are into her,” and that “you never wanted to be her friend,” and in the most respectful way possible say that “it is too painful to stay friends with her when you are into her and she doesn’t feel the same way.” That’s it. Then just stop talking to her. Unfollow her, don’t text her, done. This is what I did and it was so freeing. I felt good about myself for having taken a stand and I could tell she respected me a lot more for this than just being her friend when she knew I wanted more.
I believe in you, let me know if you have any other question.
Start working out - Nothing will more quickly transform your life than a gym habit. You will get bigger, stronger, and more attractive, there is simply no good excuse for not working out.
Do you like to wear a see-through skirt?
Stop watching porn - Here is a link to a full framework on how to quit porn Nic Moran (@NicolasCMoran) on X
Mistake #2 - Staying Friends
Mistake #3 - Feeling sorry for myself instead of improving
Why is there no great temptress figure in any of Tolkien’s major works?
I dealt with this exact situation, but am now in a loving relationship with another girl.
If she see’s you as a friend don’t wait for her to change her mind. Why? Because she won’t. She might say she has, in fact the girl I loved would often confess feelings for me but then lose them the next week and be going for some other guy. You need to realize that in her mind you are a back up option. Is that what you want to be? A backup option? OF COURSE NOT! You are deserving of real unconditional love, so don’t degrade and lower your standards for a girl that won’t give it to you.
Stop playing video games - Video games are one of the biggest time wasters there is. I remember when I was feeling sorry for myself I would play 8 hours of Red Dead Redemption 2 instead of improving. In 2021 though I quit for good and have become so much better because of it.
Why do some straight men like to suck dick but don't find other males attractive?
Use social media for posting not consuming - Social media is awful. TikTok is all just soft core porn, Instagram is brain rot and soft core porn, and Snapchat is pointless, stop taking photos of yourself and grow up. The only thing you should use social media for is creating a dope portfolio of your life that people will see and go “damn I want to be friends with that guy.” Don’t consume content, create it.
Learn a new skill - Lastly, be sure to learn a new skill. For me I learned how to play the harmonica and started doing jiu jitsu, for you it can be something else. The point is to make progress towards a goal because this will lead to greater fulfillment in life and make you more interesting to other people.
Here are the mistakes I made, and what I would have done differently given what I know today
Did the Sumerians, Babylonians and, other Mesopotamians create more, influence more and, were more advanced than Egypt?
Become educated - Now that you aren’t spending all your time on video games and social media it is time to pick up a book and start reading. Whether fiction or non-fiction it doesn’t matter, just start reading, and watch as you become smarter than you thought possible.
I know it hurts, and its hard to deal with, but follow these steps and you will get through it.
I know this is a long answer to a simple question, but only love can inspire us to make massive changes. I am so grateful that the girl I used to love didn’t love me back because honestly it had made me the man I am today and someone who I am very proud of.
Who believes that Speaker Mike Johnson will certify ‘a free and fair and legal election'? Who believes that Speaker Mike Johnson will NOT certify ‘a free and fair and legal election'? Why?
